The dating world has changed over the past few decades, largely due to the popularity of the Internet. We no longer need to go out and meet new people; instead, we can simply use our computers and smartphones to go online and make new connections with other singles from around the globe. It’s part of the new rhythm of modern life that we want things to happen immediately and as easily as possible. The question is whether everyone knows how to use a computer and how to navigate through the jungle of the World Wide Web. This is especially true for people entering their later years. The question is: Is the Web a safe place for adults to find love and companionship?
Not much different from the past
Understanding how the Internet works takes practice. At first it seems like a source of knowledge, until you realize that it’s mostly people trying to sell you things; but it takes time to understand. In addition, distinguishing between facts and lies is not as easy as it seems. A few years ago, the printed word had some meaning and validity; but if you remember correctly, not every newspaper told the truth. Even before the advent of the Internet, there was a lot of junk news media. So essentially, it’s not new, it’s just the same when placed in a different context.
For example, the concept of spam may sound strange at first. Receiving a message from a stranger offering you some inheritance or telling you that you’ve won a fortune is no different than the spam you used to receive through your mailbox. Remember all those letters saying you’ve won a cruise around the world and the only thing you had to do was send a small deposit? The drawbacks online are very similar, and once you get over the fear of using a new platform, you’ll realize that anything that sounds too good to be true usually is. In other words: your common sense must prevail online, just as it does in the real world.
What about online dating?
Finding love often puts you in a vulnerable position, as it has in the past and still does. This sounds worse than it really is, but it’s worth talking about. When you say you’re single and looking for love, you’re also saying you’re lonely and isolated; two things scammers like to jump on. Saying you’re alone on the Internet or with someone face-to-face will put you in roughly the same position. The difference is that if you do it online, you can reach more people in a shorter period of time. This is both a good and a bad thing. The good side is that, as a single person, you can reach out to other singles faster and easier. The bad side is that more people are aware of your loneliness. So what’s the solution to this problem? Well, it’s the same as before: you can tell people you’re single without making it seem like you’re lonely and vulnerable. Make sure you give the impression of being a strong person who knows what he or she wants and doesn’t compromise. This way you filter out the wrong people who want to take advantage of other people’s weaknesses. As always, it’s no different than before, only the platform has changed, the principle is still the same.
Choosing a dating site
This is the tricky part: how do you know which sites are safe and if these dating sites really work? The first thing you’ll want to do is create a new email address that you can only use for dating purposes. Just make sure that the email does not contain your last name or any numbers, such as your year of birth, so that you can maintain a certain level of anonymity.
After creating this email, you can use it to register for the website of your choice. It is important to know that any good dating site will allow you to sign up for free and you should not have to pay from the start. This way you can look around the site and its members and see if you like what you see. Using a free account usually means that the site’s functionality will be limited, but it should at least provide you with a good way to check it out without having to pay for the privilege alone.
So which site should you choose for a relationship later in life? The truth is, it really depends on what you want. There are a lot of dating sites out there, most of which focus on one thing or another. If you’re looking for a partner who is also in their later years, it’s best to avoid dating sites that are specifically aimed at younger people. Instead, you are better off searching directly into Google by typing in “adult dating sites”. The reason for choosing a mature dating site is that the people who go there are more likely to be closer to you, more like-minded, and usually have a more mature approach to dating. Younger people can be rude, and using the right site will lead to fewer rejections.
How to stay safe online
We’ve discussed the idea of making sure you don’t feel alone or desperate, but there are other steps you can take to stay safe online. One of the keys is to make sure your privacy is intact. This means you shouldn’t reveal your private phone number, your address, your last name; or any other details that people can use to find you in the real world. Anonymity is important, at least in the early stages of meeting people online.
Perhaps after talking to someone for a while, you can get a better idea of who they are and whether they are genuine. However, until you do this, it’s best to keep a wall between you and people, take your time and be patient. Don’t let your emotions dictate your actions, but use as much of your logic as possible. If someone sounds too perfect, then they usually are, and if they are really as good as they say they are, then they probably wouldn’t be using a dating site in the first place.
Another very important thing to remember: If anyone you meet online asks you for money, stop contacting them. This may sound obvious, but it is one of the classic online dating scams. That person will contact you for a while. Let you feel them out. Then one day they will tell you they have family problems, or illness; they need money. Basically they will give you warmth at first, make you trust them, and then they ask for money. One you give them money, you may never hear from them again, or they may ask for more later. So to cut this short, any money requests are off-limits and avoid them at all costs.
Finally, remember that you are using the computer from the comfort of your home. No one can really approach you, and no one should rush you into doing anything you don’t want to do or are uncomfortable with. You have the ability to dominate the situation and you are in control. Think of it this way: you can hang up on a cold salesman, you can close the door on a door-to-door salesman; and it’s easier to ignore unwanted messages. As long as you are in control, there is no reason to use dating sites in your later years. Remember, it’s all about staying together, and you’ll be fine.